Panic Attack

I am moving to the beautiful state of Hawaii! It’s probably the prettiest of all the states too. I couldn’t help but feel like I’m leaving the country though! How many states do we have that you can pack a bunch of beachwear and sunblock?  Hawaii felt so far and I was reminded how far it was when the flight attendance declared the time zone change.  Joe taps me on the shoulder and tells me we are passing Maui! Joe didn’t get much sleep and I was too anxious to get any real rest. I did love having a travel partner. It was great to slip my feet into Joe’s when I got cold or when I needed a shoulder to catch a quick nap, his was right there. He makes me smile. Everything about him is so refreshing. He’s kind, thoughtful and geniune. However he always seems worried though. I wonder what he fears or what he’s thinking sometimes. I on the other hand don’t hide my emotions well, not that I intended to but I would never want to make him worry intentionally.  I looked over and Joe points out Oahu. It was just as pretty as I last remembered when I was on the plane with Cat. I smiled and was excited to land. I really hate long flights. That feeling was quickly over when the flight attendance made an announcement to strap on our seatbelt because we would be landing very shortly.  As we were declining in elevation, Joe took my hand and kissed me. I smiled and squeeze his hand.  Ten, nine, eight…three, two, breathe… and we landed.

The door of the plane opened and a burst of warm air hits me. It felt warmer this time. Only minutes outside and I felt sticky. Joe grabs my hand and we moved through the crowd. We had a lot of luggage to pick up and my fingers were crossed hoping that it all landed safely. We stood by the baggage claim and since majority of my luggage was considered oversize, it didn’t take too long for me to collect everything. We then headed to the parking structure to find Joe’s truck. Joe effortlessly threw the luggage in the bed of his truck and off we went.

As soon as we got on the freeway, a burst of emotions hit me. I starred at the highway and just started to notice the kind of people that were around me. Then I noticed the cars, the homes and the street names. I felt sweaty and thoughts of my family and friends ran through my head and I immediately thought “what have I done!” Joe felt I was off and without saying much, he squeezed my hand and told me his loved me. I didn’t response so he asked me if everything was ok. I replied with a half smile and asked him to give me a few minutes. I needed to recollect my thoughts and more importantly I needed to breathe. Everything at that moment seem so chaotic. The freeway felt small, the air felt hot and nothing looked familiar. I didn’t want to stress Joe out but I couldn’t help but freak out. I was always thought I was adventurous but this really was taking it to a whole different level. I thought about how I left my parents, my siblings, my friends and my job!

To keep myself distracted and to not worry Joe, I talked about Tahoe.  I told him I loved him. I started talking about how we fell in love and asked him if he promised to be honest and faithful to me. He grinned and said ” I love you. I absolutely will be honest and faithful”. Just like that I smiled and I remembered why I decided to take this risk. Love is worth it.  Since my last relationships, I can honestly say that none of them were worth the risk, the heartache or the time. However I don’t regret any of it either. Those relationships made me wiser and more determine that I was close to finding my soul mate.  I can honestly say with Joe, that everything is worth the risk. You can’t pass up this kind of love. This kind of love only happens once in a lifetime and to walk away from it because of fear seems silly.  We got to North Shore and I immediately felt at ease.  Who would have thought the country would put me at ease. I looked to my left as we continued to Haleiwa, I knew everything would be awesome.

Next blog: First Adventure

Aloha Hawaii

Dad drives Joe and me to the airport. I watched Joe and my dad take my luggages out of the car and I watch it sat there on the curb. Without hesitation, I hugged and kissed my dad farewell. I couldn’t help but hold him longer because I knew it would be a while before I got another one. I watch my dad drive off in the LA traffic and turned to Joe. I smiled at him trying desperately to hold back any tears. He knew I needed a hug and he went to embraced me. He kissed me and told me he loved me. His smile was enough for me to move forward. Joe tugged my hands to get going. I watched the baggage man take my luggages. From there Joe and I went to security and then to our terminal after that. I started to get excited and anxious. A 5 hour flight isn’t the shortest but it also isn’t the longest. Joe kept me busy with plans on what would happen for the rest of the day. As he talked, I kept thinking whether Hawaii would be all I remembered it to be. Places have a way of appearing so magical and beautiful. I hoped for the same feelings if not more when I returned. The difference this time was that it wasn’t a vacation. It was to live.  I kissed Joe and held his hand tight. The door of the plane closed and we were getting ready for the runway. There was no more turning back. Bye-bye Cali.

A bike box, a few luggages and a couple carry on. I travel light.

Next Blog: Panic Attack

Joe Comes Back

Why did Joe come back to the OC? To make sure I board that plane of course! What he didn’t realize was that I was way more excited then nervous!  I’ve been packing for weeks and when you pack your life in boxes, it’s really hard to select what to bring and what to leave behind.  Luckily I have an amazing boyfriend who told me to pack it all! When he arrived at the airport, it was such a rush to see him. It’s been about a month since Tahoe. Since Tahoe, our way of communication was texting and FaceTime. Thank goodness for technology.  I’m truly blessed to have him here to help me because we both know that I’ll need a hand to squeeze as I kiss my family and friends farewell.   Everyday was planned accordingly until our departure.

Our nightly conversations.

As soon as he got in town, we had time to check in the hotel and relax. We had reservations at Alessa with my parents so we headed to Laguna Beach.  Alessa is located in one of my favorite cities in Orange County as well as one of my favorite Italian restaurants.

My amazing and supportive parents.

My parents are definitely cool. At least that’s what Joe tells me.  As supportive as any parent can be, they were more nervous about this move, especially my mom. I think my dad is just thrilled to have a new buddy to play golf with. More importantly he’s also thrilled that I’m happy.  My mom has seen too many bad stories from her girlfriends. Many of her girlfriend’s moved for a man and many didn’t have good stories to share in the end.  So naturally, she’s concerned. After all, her successful daughter is leaving to an island for a man she’s met less than several months that just happens to be a 5 hour plane trip away. I definitely didn’t make it any easier.  None the less, they trusted me and gave their blessings.

Joe got the “talk” from my parents. I thought it would be the “mess with my daughter, and Ill come after you” conversation, but instead it was short and sweet. I was surprised because my dad is known for his 3 hour lectures that pretty much numbs you. He told us to have fun and remember that this is a stage of getting to know each other under the same roof. It’s normal to argue, great to laugh, good to listen to each other but more importantly, always love one another unconditionally.

The next day was filled with errands such as shipping on clothes out via USPS. Did I mention moving to Hawaii is not cheap? Yup. Later that night, we had dinner plans with some of my favorite couples, Bao and John, Theresa and Jeremy and Anna and Josh. I had to have some of my best friends meet the new man in my life! We had dinner at Tannin’s. It’s another great wine bar in south Orange County snugged in another amazing city called San Juan Capistrano. My friends got to meet the man I’ve been talking about. In the end, I kissed and said my “see you laters” to some of my dearest friends. After all that, I have to admit, I had such great friends and family in California. Why was I so willing to give it a go somewhere else? Perhaps I felt like I did try in California. Or perhaps I was just ready for something else? Orange County is great but I wasn’t quite satisfied. Although Hawaii isn’t the big city or very diverse it had one thing I wanted, Joe.

Sunday was my surprise day for Joe.  I surprised him with Lakers ticket! How could he come here and not go to a game with me.  We headed out to the glamorous city of Los Angeles to see his favorite basketball team. By now, if you forgot, I was the Clippers fan so this was definitely a selfless act.

Next Blog: Aloha Hawaii!